Dinner Bell Matt

There once was a fellow named Matthew.  Matthew liked to party hardy in the yesteryears of his lifetime.  He was such a big partier that he once left the seat on a toilet up and his girlfriend fell into it.  That was unfortunate but his girlfriend was a real sport and never complained.  He offered her a party cake once for her birthday and that was really nice.  But Matthew was angry and he didn't like it that his girlfriend was really into knitting.  His girlfriend loved to knit and it was a pleasure for her to make lots of sweaters in her spare time.  She was so good that she might make ten sweaters in a day.  I liked his girl friend and we will call her Clarice.  Clarice was rich beyond measures and it drove Matthew to the bank with a switch blade in his hand to demand that the teller release Clarice's accounts to him for his inspection.  Clarice was benevolent however and even though she knew he did this to her on a monthly basis, she still gave Matthew a big kiss in the beginning and end of the day.  Clarice was smart though, she knew that Matthew liked to swallow swords and she let him do it any time he wanted.  She did not want Matthew to think that she thought it was a horrible pagan habit. It wasn't but people might think it was.  So Clarice was a good friend to Matthew's habit and she never complained.  But one day Matthew sliced open his nostril with the edge of the sword.  Clarice called the emergency room and they went together to get him stitched up. Matthew swore he might never thank Clarice enough but then walked out on her and left her in the hospital and he even drove home without her.  Matthew was cruel in this regard but he still loved her. He paid a taxi cab drive double to take her home and even take her for ice cream which was ok but she didn't like the pistachio flavor that was the only flavor that Matthew authorized her to have.  I did not enjoy Matthews company but I tolerated his treatment of Clarice.  Clarice was a special sort and she was educated in all of the humanities including economics and politics.  She liked to ask many questions and when Matthew found out that she asked the Ambassador to China where he kept his tickets to Disneyland, he freaked out and asked her to stay away from his Matchbox collection.  Clarice was not a matchbox connoisseur but she did like to light matches once in a while.  It was too bad because she never touched another match that Matthew owned and that's the end of this story.  Many blessings to Clarice. I hope that she will enjoy the new matchbox collection that was bigger than Matthew's and given to her by that Ambassador to China.  He was really a neat fellow. :).